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The Ofsted Massacre
Written by Phil Porter
Directed by Joe Murphy
Performed in The Sainsbury Theatre
In this riotously funny comedy, the teachers of Sussex Weald College are pulling out all the stops to survive their impending Ofsted inspection. Underhand tactics are called for if they’re to avoid an ‘Inadequate’. But as tensions rise, and with the threat of special measures looming, it isn’t long before drastic action is taken. As the two sides become increasingly entrenched in their hostility, things get personal and the situation swiftly descends into anarchy.
Phil Porter has written for theatre, television, opera and radio. His theatre work includes Vice Versa and The Christmas Truce for the RSC, The Miser (nominated for Best New Comedy at the Olivier Awards 2018), Blink (Soho Theatre and worldwide), The Cracks in My Skin (winner of a Bruntwood Prize) and Pinocchio at the Royal Opera House.
Mon 8 July – 7.30pm
Wed 10 July – 7.30pm
Thu 11 July – 2pm
Fri 12 July – 7.30pm
Sat 13 July – 2pm
Mon 15 July – 7.30pm
Tue 16 July – 2pm
Priority booking opens on 24 April (by phone) and general booking on the 30 April.
You can book your tickets either online or by calling LAMDA's Box Office on 020 8834 0550 (Mon–Fri, 12–5pm).
Price: £14 (£7 concessions)* Group booking: £9 each for groups of ten or more.
*Concession tickets are available to Hammersmith & Fulham residents, students, people over 65 or under 18 and those in receipt of Jobseeker’s Allowance.
You will need to provide proof of eligibility for these concessions when collecting your tickets. Please drop us an email to [email protected] if you have any queries about what to provide. Tickets are strictly non-refundable and can only be exchanged subject to availability and an exchange fee. Please book early to avoid disappointment.
Please collect your tickets from our Box Office at least 15 minutes prior to the performance. You can find our full Box Office Terms and Conditions below:
Box Office Terms and Conditions
Credit/debit card payments are non-refundable under any circumstances other than card payment errors.
For access information, please call our Box Office on 020 8834 0550 or email [email protected]
How to find LAMDA
155 Talgarth Road
The nearest tube station is Barons Court, which is served by the District and Piccadilly lines.
Designer - Ruari Murchison
Mark - William Bishop
Frank - Benjamin Bridson
Declan - Bradley Craig
Ros - Chloe English
Yvette - Elizabeth Hammerton
Lis - Hannah Kenifick
Liane - Emma Laristan
Vince - Ethan Moorhouse
Grant - Stanley Morgan
John - Charlie MacVicar
Joe - Joe McNamara
Felicity - Julia Romano
Gordon - Nathan Ricard
Nicola / Izzy - Isabella Verrico
Margot - Georgia Warlow
Production Manager - Jamie MacDonald
Stage Manager - Imogen Adshead
Deputy Stage Manager - Michaela Field
Assistant Stage Managers - Nevison Kusokora & Tabitha Piggott
Lighting Designer - Corben Jones
Sound Designer/PSE - Oliver Simkin
Sound Assistants - Bella Kear & Ben Wright
Chief Lx - Amy Grudniewicz
Lx Crew - Emily Baxter, Elke de Valck, Evie Graham-Brown, Oliver Horne, Hannah Jarocka, Macushla McGown
Production Carpenter - Jaspal Jabbal
Construction Crew - Raveena Ambani, Lucy Bailey, Joe Capjon, Laura Howard, James Richards